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Saturday, February 14, 2009

In Sickness and In Health, Through the good and the bad and the downright ugly!

I am laying in bed just reminicsing on the past year and a half. I feel like the days have gone by so quickly and I wish I could have made more of some of those days. I have no regrets though because it has all been a growing experience. Yesterday, I asked my husband "are you the man I married?" and his response "no I am better than the man you married, I am a grown version". How insightful!

I remember the days following our return from Ghana when I would be so upset because I could not work. Oh and at the time, we still had quite a bit of money so all I wanted to do was satisfy my addiction to shop.(Glad to report that I am on my way to being cured!...hehehe...I have a weakness for shoes)Not working has put my priorities in perspective and made me realize that even though I need to take care of myself and my family, there are lots of people less fortunate than I am and I need to be more thankful and grateful. Someday, I hope I will be able to bless and empower people so much so that my name will be synonymous with blessing!

Ok, I totally went off on a tangent there because this is supposed to be my valentine's day entry! I have thought about all the things that people encounter in their relationships and I have come to the conclusion that when you are saying your marriage vows, you should pay attention to each and every word you speak. They carry a lot of weight and therefore should not be taken lightly. I can say that we are going through part of the "the bad times" because we are living on one income and nobody knows about the nights when all we had was each other to hold on to. There have been times during this economic disaster when we did not know if Thomas would still have a job the next day. During those times we could hardly sleep and would ask each other "are you sleeping" from time to time. However, it is on some of those nights that we realized we were living the words in our vows that were difficult to imagine.

Again, no one knows how he brings me breakfast in bed on the weekends or how he steals glances at me when I am dressing up. Some of my happiest moments are when he would walk behind me so silently and tickle my belly till I can't scream anymore. And even though sometimes I pretend to hate it,I love it with all my heart!

I am not cynical about valentine's day, neither do I think it should be celebrated as if it was a holiday. I think especially for married couples with kids, it is an opportunity to reconnect because of the daily grind. For me it is a day of reflecting on my growth in love or stagnation and doing something about it. The teddy bears,chocolate, flowers, cards, jewelery is all nice but what is left when all that is gone? What will you celebrate if you can not afford all that?

3 comments:

y_cul said...

There is nothing better than having someone you know you can rely on during the tough times!!! I think of you in my prayers, and i am glad you have not lost focus. Never forgot who have on your side apart from your husband. He has looked after you from the time you were concieved till now. He says do not despair, and more importantly HE HAS GOT EVERYTHING IN CONTROL.

I always look at what you and Bee have got, and it gives me hope that true love exists, and marriage is a good thing!

Love ya

Maxine Mosley Totoe said...

Lucy! I am thankful for people like you who have enriched my life with your friendship!

Omo Oba said...

Ha, loved Thomas' response...now thats a real man, how lucky you are. If we looked to marriage as a sacrament, then we would realize that marriage vows are sacred..each word carries a certain weight...Thank you for highlighting that because marriage so aint a bed of roses.
As y-cul said, God will see you thru this times and I am glad you are on your well on your way towards being cured from 'shoe madness' :)