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Tuesday, September 29, 2009

The Fragrance left on the Heel that Crushed the Flowers!

My friend had a quote on her facebook status and this is what it said: All the water in the world, however hard it tried, could never sink a ship unless it got inside. All the hardships of this world, might wear you pretty thin, but they won't hurt you, one least bit...unless you let them in. (Anonymous)
Isn't that so true? I tend to think of forgiveness or unforgiveness in the same way. In a way not forgiving others can eat at you so much that it can leave you very bitter and and pessimistic about everything in life. It is a struggle to come to that point where you want to forgive people of the hurt and pain they cause you. When you hold on so tightly to whatever memory of wrong doing the other party might have invoked, it is like extra baggage and you will project it on to new relationships and experiences in your life instead of looking at things in a different light.

As the years go by, I have come to realize that the decision to forgive is not an easy one especially if there is a constant reminder of the hurt that was caused. When you decide to get to that point, it will be like the callus that has formed on the wound over the years will slowly start to peel away, layer by layer. It might not be an instant thing; the memory may not disappear suddenly but at least you will be doing yourself a big favor! As I always say, you can not be drinking poison and expect another person to die from the venom. I pray you all have an amazing week and the beginning of fall will bring to you a new beginning in your life as well. Blessings!

10 comments:

Nana Yaw Asiedu said...

Hmm, don't I know what you're saying. Sooo true. There is only one person I have been unable to forgive in life. But, lately, I feel the bitterness fast disappearing. In any case, I realise part of my reason for not forgiving her is arrogance - for I myself have wronged others who have forgiven me. I would have to be perfect/infallible to refuse to forgive others. Thanks for sharing these thoughtful words.

yankeenaijababe said...

Forgiveness is not as easy as one thinks, a lot of adults still hold on to the little things, learning to forgive takes patience and is something you do from the heart knowing real success happens when one learns to forgive.

Hope all is well.

Maxine said...

@NYA- Right on! Sometimes we forget that we have wronged so many people either knowingly or unknowingly and have been forgiven and as such we need to return the favor to others :)

@YNC- You're very right. Forgiveness is not easy partly because holding on to the hurt feeds our ego and the idea of having the upper hand. So forgiveness takes a lot of humility and being able to accept the fact that we are not perfect either.:)
I'm doing great!

RocNaija said...

Fab quote..
Absolutely luv it!!

Boakyewaa said...

I love the quote. The water also gets in if your foundation or your building blocks are weak. You may think you're not consciously opening yourself up to pain and troubles, but something isn't right within you that lets it all in.
I struggle with forgiveness all the time. Its such a tough tough thing, seriously. And I get to the point where I'm like, okay, I forgive you, but I still dont wanna know you. Is that bad? I dont know. I can forgive I guess, but because I don't wanna be reminded of what you did, I'd rather remove you from my situation as well.
Oh well. And so we keep struggling on...

Sweetnothin' said...

Thanks for your prayers. I really need to walk down that forgiveness road, but it seems so easy to put it off until later

Mame said...

Forgiveness is definitely hard. I have learnt that praying for those who hurt you works so well but it takes so much effort to do that. God help us cos like Maxine said, we also hurt others and expect to be forgiven...

yankeenaijababe said...

It pays to forgive,still working on mine...checking on ya.

simplychic said...

that quote is exactly what i need right now :)

Maxine said...

@Roc- :)
@Ms. B- That is very profound and so true too!
@sweetnothin'- I gotchu boo :)
@Mame- Very true!
@YNC- We're all a work in progress :)
@Simplychic- Glad I could indulge you :)